The Urban Dictionary defines Programmer as an organism that turns coffee into code. They are, of course, dead wrong. I’m a programmer – at least by day – so I know what I’m talking about. I love the coffee of course – Mocha Kenya is my poison – don’t judge me until you’ve been there, done that and walked a mile in my caffeine-stained T-shirt.
My wife is decidedly NOT a programmer. She’d slap you upside the head and shoulders for suggesting such a thing, while fixing you with her patent-pending stainless steely gaze. She is, however a published writer and editor of textbooks, and she turns french vanilla flavoured ground and filtered 100% Arabica into code.
Because make no mistake – writing too is code – as are pictures, movies, games, metaphors, remixes, and a gazillion other outpourings of human creativity which execute in the blob-like ~86bn CPUs housed in craniums all over the planet – some of them right here in my very own home. ~86bn? Approximately 86 billion neurons – that’s the average number in a human brain, but who’s counting?
This all of course goes to prove that my wife IS a programmer. If you don’t tell her, she’ll never find out I said so. Hopefully she’ll never see these ramblings. But witness protection aside, I think the Urban Dictionary definition could benefit from a slight tweak. I like: The organism most noted for turning caffeine and other substances into code is Homo Sapiens.
This blog is my last-ditch attempt to be a Homo Sapiens when I grow up. Be warned though – by reading this you are an supporting my coffee habit. For that I thank you from the bottom of my ~86bn CPU.